-Sleeping Giant Inn, I’m not sure a more ominous name is possible considering the circumstances.
-Ok, everyone ready? We are going to calmly walk up to this massive, and hopefully already filled grave, at which point we will have a lovely picnic.
-The alternate plan is probably less pleasant.
-Oh... my... god. YOU! You’re the dragon that burned down Helgen! Don’t just raise a different dragon from the dead and fly away! WAIT! I’M TALKING TO YOU! COME BACK!
-Punchy! Send out the Reggie! Snuggleface... Snuggleface? Where the hell did you.... YOU STARTED A FIGHT WITH A GIANT?! Could you have picked a worse time?!
-WAIT! Ok, so we need a plan, because right now the two best ones I have are “let’s get eaten”, and “let’s get smashed with a club”.
-Giant first, dragon second! You picked the wrong day to kick my dog you genetic freak! *thwomp*
-Fine, I’m wasting one more arrow on you, it WILL bring you to your knees for seven seconds, if their is a merciful god that will be enough time for Punchy and the dogs to end you.
-WOLVES?! This is neither the time nor the place for this!
-Reggie! How nice of you to show up! Please, break these wolves under your terrifying blade.
-*Drinks trueshot potion, applies highest poison to arrow* prepare to fall from the sky like a misshaped snowflake you winged bastard.
-Arrow back... leading the target.. release....
-Right in the neck! OH MY GOD I’M AMAZING!
-Really! I could take that shot fifty more times and never hit it again!
-The irony of you crash landing directly onto the grave you just rose from is not lost on me.
-Those two goats didn’t even flinch when a dragon skidded to a stop two feet from them! I’ve never seen such an epic goat, much less two.
-No no no! Don’t go airborne again! My god, I would trade every belonging I have for a dragon sized grappling hook.
-You are BEYOND out numbered, from one reptile to another, take my advice, just quit squirming around and I’ll see that your death is dignified.
-Well, other than the dogs trying to chew out your organs. I really can’t do much about that.
-Ladies, gentlemen... dogs. Allow me to bring this battle to an end. *thwomp*
-That tested our steel, eh? But we.. OH CRAP, IS THE GIANT DEAD?! He is? Oh, thank god.
-HA! Who’s awesome?! WE’RE AWESOME!
-This game needs a *Group Hug* option.
-So Delphine, now that you have witnessed the miracle that is me, anything else you need to share?
-I’ve known you all of fifteen minutes and you already have more secrets than Batman, no way in hell this rabbit hole isn’t way deeper.
-Wait... you’ve been waiting for me? You’re my guardian? AND AN ENTIRE SOCIETY EXISTS TO SERVE ME?!
-I... wait... no no, look, I don’t know who you think I am, but I’m not that guy.
-It’s not that I don’t appreciate the thought, but I have Punchy and the dogs here. I guess what I’m saying is I have all the guardians I need right here.
-Sure, we’ll meet you back at Riverwood, but we have few loose ends to tie up first. See you soon.
-Ok, everyone ready? We are going to calmly walk up to this massive, and hopefully already filled grave, at which point we will have a lovely picnic.
-The alternate plan is probably less pleasant.
-Oh... my... god. YOU! You’re the dragon that burned down Helgen! Don’t just raise a different dragon from the dead and fly away! WAIT! I’M TALKING TO YOU! COME BACK!
-Punchy! Send out the Reggie! Snuggleface... Snuggleface? Where the hell did you.... YOU STARTED A FIGHT WITH A GIANT?! Could you have picked a worse time?!
-WAIT! Ok, so we need a plan, because right now the two best ones I have are “let’s get eaten”, and “let’s get smashed with a club”.
-Giant first, dragon second! You picked the wrong day to kick my dog you genetic freak! *thwomp*
-Fine, I’m wasting one more arrow on you, it WILL bring you to your knees for seven seconds, if their is a merciful god that will be enough time for Punchy and the dogs to end you.
-WOLVES?! This is neither the time nor the place for this!
-Reggie! How nice of you to show up! Please, break these wolves under your terrifying blade.
-*Drinks trueshot potion, applies highest poison to arrow* prepare to fall from the sky like a misshaped snowflake you winged bastard.
-Arrow back... leading the target.. release....
-Right in the neck! OH MY GOD I’M AMAZING!
-Really! I could take that shot fifty more times and never hit it again!
-The irony of you crash landing directly onto the grave you just rose from is not lost on me.
-Those two goats didn’t even flinch when a dragon skidded to a stop two feet from them! I’ve never seen such an epic goat, much less two.
-No no no! Don’t go airborne again! My god, I would trade every belonging I have for a dragon sized grappling hook.
-You are BEYOND out numbered, from one reptile to another, take my advice, just quit squirming around and I’ll see that your death is dignified.
-Well, other than the dogs trying to chew out your organs. I really can’t do much about that.
-Ladies, gentlemen... dogs. Allow me to bring this battle to an end. *thwomp*
-That tested our steel, eh? But we.. OH CRAP, IS THE GIANT DEAD?! He is? Oh, thank god.
-HA! Who’s awesome?! WE’RE AWESOME!
-This game needs a *Group Hug* option.
-So Delphine, now that you have witnessed the miracle that is me, anything else you need to share?
-I’ve known you all of fifteen minutes and you already have more secrets than Batman, no way in hell this rabbit hole isn’t way deeper.
-Wait... you’ve been waiting for me? You’re my guardian? AND AN ENTIRE SOCIETY EXISTS TO SERVE ME?!
-I... wait... no no, look, I don’t know who you think I am, but I’m not that guy.
-It’s not that I don’t appreciate the thought, but I have Punchy and the dogs here. I guess what I’m saying is I have all the guardians I need right here.
-Sure, we’ll meet you back at Riverwood, but we have few loose ends to tie up first. See you soon.
These goats are so stoic they have been cast in George Lucas' next movie.
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