-Paarthurnax, you’re just sinister enough that I trust you.
-So, according to those creepy old dudes living at the top of a different mountain, if I read this scroll I’ll get a glimpse of the last time Alduin gave this world a run for its money.
-Problem is, I don’t trust them. Maybe it’s the beards, maybe it’s the fact that only one of them ever says anything, maybe… maybe it’s a lot of things.
-Also, I’m really not sure I see the benefit in this. Alduin showed up, wrecked up the place, then got beat down by a couple of people with the proper mix of bravery and insanity. Not sure what I can learn by watching that play out. Punchy and I are already pretty brave in a reckless sorta way. I mean, I think we already have all the qualifications we need.
-I guess no time like the present. Let’s just unroll this and MY GOD, SEEING THROUGH TIME IS SO BRIGHT
-Wait, who are these people? Looks like two Nords, the guy seems to have just enough sense to be afraid. The woman, on the other hand, seems like she would fistfight the sun.
-I like her.
-Who’s the old guy that just showed up? He seems to be one of the Greybeards, he also seems to be under the impression he is running the show. I’m not sure he is.
-Well, they dispensed with the first dragon without much issue, this next one… he seems bigger and angrier and….
-Alduin.
-Ok, you know what? Maybe I can learn something from this after all.
-So guys, how DO you kill Alduin? I have my notebook ready.
-Wait? Did I just learn a shout the Greybeard used? Dragonrend? How did that happen?!
-I’ve never understood the implications of time travel and this isn’t helping.
-Geez, Alduin is terrifying, but it looks like Dragonrend really takes the wind out of his sails, or wings. Or whatever.
-Hey! That’s it?! The vision is over?
-If the vision is over why can I still hear Alduin? Maybe the vision is still going? Paarthurnax, where ya going big guy?
-Oh no.
-ALDUIN!
-I… I’m not ready for this! What the.. IT’S RAINING FLAMING ROCKS?!
-Punchy! Get cover! NOW!
-*Thwomp* *Thwomp* The arrows are worthless against him! Not to mention EVERYTHING is on fire!
-Punchy! Come on, back on your feet! Paarthurnax, I need you buy me some time!
-Listen Punchy, you’re not allowed to die! Not here, not now and not to this bastard!
-The question is, how to slow him down... DRAGONREND! How did I forget about something I just learned two minutes ago?!
-Hey Alduin! Do the words JOOR ZAH FRUL ring any bells?! Seeing as how you’re falling out of the sky I’m guessing they do!
-You! YOU! Do you have you any idea how much I HATE you?! This! ALL OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT!
-Listen Buddy, one of us is going to die on this mountain and I’m entirely too handsome to be a corpse!
-*Thwomp* My god, how thick is your hide?! *Thwomp* This is going to take forever! No no, don’t fly away yet! I’m not done murdering you!
-Oh god, he wasn’t fleeing, HE WAS PREPARING MORE FLAMING ROCKS!
(to be continued)
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| The only three people in the history of time with less survival instincts than I. |
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