-Nothing says “party time” quite like putting on my favorite quilt and pretending it’s a suit.
-This plan seemed way more sane before we actually started it. Do we really expect that no one will notice that I don’t fit in at this party? I’m going to be the only non-bastard at this thing, if they ask me any questions IT WILL BLOW MY COVER!
-Blend in with party, sneak away from party, steal documents, somehow NOT get caught doing any of this and then escape. I really should have written up a last will and testament before we departed.
-Delphine may trust you, Malborn, but I’m not Delphine. I can’t believe I need to hand you my trusty bow so that you can smuggle it into the party. But like most parties I attend, in order to survive it, I will need to be armed to the teeth.
-This place is filled with people I have nothing in common with and can not stand to talk to; it’s my prom all over again.
-You need me to cause a distraction? It is safe to say that is within my skill-set.
-Right, let’s see, throw some vases around the room? Nope, no response.... hmm.
-How about I eat all the salmon at the buffet table like a rabid bear? NOTHING?! Really?! This seems like normal behavior to you people?!
-I HAVE NOW CONSUMED ALL YOUR FOOD! I’ve also taken all the silverware! Why do you not care?! Damn it, what do I have to do to cause a distraction? I... should I get naked? Dear god please don’t let that be the solution.
-Here we go, this chap here is the man I need, he is the equivalent of everyone’s drunk and creepy uncle. Perfect.
-Of course you need more alcohol good sir, lucky for you I have several bottles of crazy fuel for your consumption.
-Jerk + alcohol = a life lesson.... also, a distraction.
-Come on Malborn, I’m not sure how long the drunken floor show can go on... he looks like he only has one good jig in him before he blacks out.
-Through the kitchen, through the back room, gather up my bow... consider hugging it, decide against it, kick open the final door...
-Ah, hello Thalmor/Santorum guards. I was just... you see... the.. uhhh... I’m looking for the bathroom?
-Nope, you’re not buying it... not that I blame you. But you do understand what needs to happen next, yes? *thwomp* *slash* *thwomp*
-All of these guards are wearing super light weight and valuable elven armor? I’m going to leave a path of so many naked guards! It’s going to look like Hanzel and Gredel’s bread crumb trail.
-Here we go, all the documentation I came for and... wait, how do I get out of here? This place is crawling with many angry and, for the moment, fully clothed guards. Also, I feel like I should not leave Malborn behind.
-Ah! There you are Malborn! I see you’ve managed to get yourself captured, lucky for you I’m completely certain I can pick off your captors without hitting you.*Thwomp*
-I’ll be honest, I can’t believe I didn’t just accidentally murder you, I was pretty much firing blind. Any chance you’re going to lead me out of here? Please be on a path out of this place.
- Freedom! and Punchy! and the dogs! Three of my favorite things!
- Right, off we go to find Delphine... but first we need to find a merchant that is interested in purchasing several complete sets of Elven armor, most of which are still warm.
-This plan seemed way more sane before we actually started it. Do we really expect that no one will notice that I don’t fit in at this party? I’m going to be the only non-bastard at this thing, if they ask me any questions IT WILL BLOW MY COVER!
-Blend in with party, sneak away from party, steal documents, somehow NOT get caught doing any of this and then escape. I really should have written up a last will and testament before we departed.
-Delphine may trust you, Malborn, but I’m not Delphine. I can’t believe I need to hand you my trusty bow so that you can smuggle it into the party. But like most parties I attend, in order to survive it, I will need to be armed to the teeth.
-This place is filled with people I have nothing in common with and can not stand to talk to; it’s my prom all over again.
-You need me to cause a distraction? It is safe to say that is within my skill-set.
-Right, let’s see, throw some vases around the room? Nope, no response.... hmm.
-How about I eat all the salmon at the buffet table like a rabid bear? NOTHING?! Really?! This seems like normal behavior to you people?!
-I HAVE NOW CONSUMED ALL YOUR FOOD! I’ve also taken all the silverware! Why do you not care?! Damn it, what do I have to do to cause a distraction? I... should I get naked? Dear god please don’t let that be the solution.
-Here we go, this chap here is the man I need, he is the equivalent of everyone’s drunk and creepy uncle. Perfect.
-Of course you need more alcohol good sir, lucky for you I have several bottles of crazy fuel for your consumption.
-Jerk + alcohol = a life lesson.... also, a distraction.
-Come on Malborn, I’m not sure how long the drunken floor show can go on... he looks like he only has one good jig in him before he blacks out.
-Through the kitchen, through the back room, gather up my bow... consider hugging it, decide against it, kick open the final door...
-Ah, hello Thalmor/Santorum guards. I was just... you see... the.. uhhh... I’m looking for the bathroom?
-Nope, you’re not buying it... not that I blame you. But you do understand what needs to happen next, yes? *thwomp* *slash* *thwomp*
-All of these guards are wearing super light weight and valuable elven armor? I’m going to leave a path of so many naked guards! It’s going to look like Hanzel and Gredel’s bread crumb trail.
-Here we go, all the documentation I came for and... wait, how do I get out of here? This place is crawling with many angry and, for the moment, fully clothed guards. Also, I feel like I should not leave Malborn behind.
-Ah! There you are Malborn! I see you’ve managed to get yourself captured, lucky for you I’m completely certain I can pick off your captors without hitting you.*Thwomp*
-I’ll be honest, I can’t believe I didn’t just accidentally murder you, I was pretty much firing blind. Any chance you’re going to lead me out of here? Please be on a path out of this place.
- Freedom! and Punchy! and the dogs! Three of my favorite things!
- Right, off we go to find Delphine... but first we need to find a merchant that is interested in purchasing several complete sets of Elven armor, most of which are still warm.
Terrible people at a terrible party.
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